Monday, May 17, 2010

Grizzly Bear Tuesday

There’s some building work going on in the apartment upstairs so I was startled into Tuesday by the screech of a 7am drill. Man, this incessant din is ringing in me ears!!! Not to mention the arrival of an unfamiliar May chill in the air (goodbye summer, hello brrrrrr,) which turned my skin unattractively chickeny. I padded to the kitchen, to greet the soggy, miserable day outside and felt decidedly blah… Maybe it was the early morning dental appointment, or my thwarted efforts to get some inspirational reading material from the library (I was refused the books without any photo ID because my account had expired apparently) or maybe it was because I decided not to practice today to give myself some much-needed rest; but today seems to have set itself up to be a bit of a stinker.

(Having just one of those days....)

So, the first day of my yoga blogging experiment and I feel like I have started to lose whatever calm, poise and free-spirited determination my travels may have blessed me. So I decided to wallow in it, to loiter in my pyjamas and flick between BBC news and the Today show until 9am, also known as D-Day.

But in fact the dentist was fine (with dentists, it's the fear isn’t it? Have the teeth-crumbling sugary lollies I couldn't resist when I was working in an office, and the constant cups of tea finally decided to come back and bite me?)... Phew, no fillings a bit of a polish and the mandatory reminder to floss every day. All good.

But then I decided to go to the library (buying books is so last season). I must admit I was utterly ashamed at myself for turning on my heels and not even giving the chap in the library the dignity of eye contact, as I huffed out the library, tossing an indignant “yeah whatever” at his very reasonable offer to keep the books behind the counter for me until I returned with my ID. What a teenager. I mean seriously, you call yourself a yogi and you can’t even cope with a bit of grizzly weather, a better than expected visit to the dentist, and a wasted trip to the library. You’re not even working! It’s not like time is precious is it, you’ve got all afternoon to find your ID and get back there (that’s if I can bring myself to face that gentle-faced librarian again)....

It’s just that though. I feel like I should know better. It’s a constant inner battle between reacting to those things that niggle you, that look set to turn your day into something ugly and inevitable; and of trying to remain calm, put things into perspective. Now that I have hopped aboard my little yogi boat, I’ve put all this pressure on myself to be a world-class sailor. If 16-year-old Jessica Watson can sail around the world on her own, with no human contact for 7 months, facing Atlantic storms, sleepless nights and a whole host of other unimaginable dangers, surely I can manage my little boat, bobbing around on Sydney harbour. I am twice her age after all. But surely Jess had her off days and I am having one of mine today.I'll ride this little storm (it's only a small one) and let’s hope tomorrow is a little less grizzly bear and a little more yogi bear.

No comments:

Post a Comment